The decision to adopt a baby was not our first option as we desperately wanted to father a child or two of our own. However having considered the exhaustive process as well as the reality that a surrogacy would still not guarantee us a baby, we settled on the adoption route and initiated the search for the ‘perfect’ process to follow. The time frame from making the application to the first moment we held JJ in our arms was a mere 14 months although it felt like a life time. Now a further 2 years down the line, we realise every single day that God has a plan for each and every one of us and that plan cannot be rushed, wished away or altered in any way. It is what it is.
Despite all the advice, support, reading, on-line searches and, and, and…nothing could have prepared us for fatherhood. It turned our lives up-side down, made us re-evaluate our priorities, sold the sports cars for a family wagon, cancelled all the clothing shop cards and changed the man cave, the sanctuary and the study into a baby’s room.
And you know what; we would do it all again tomorrow!
JJ has taken over. At 2 years he is a healthy, strong, charming, handsome kid…he charms his way into the heart of every single lady he meets with his smile. His vocab is going viral and surprises us on a daily basis with words we often wonder where he heard them first…at home, at the park with his friends in the complex or at school. We can’t keep up with his growth spurts and the ever shrinking clothes which need to be replaced monthly. He is now riding his bike without training wheels and his first “big boy’s” bed has been ordered and the cot sold. Duvet sets in blues, greys and reds are ready and waiting and the story books piling up in his room.
We have wild and lofty plans and aspirations for this little ‘coffee bean’ that has now become the centre of our universe but even though we want him to become a Springbok rugby player or a doctor or even President of South Africa, we want him to be happy first. Loved by his two dads, two sets of extended families, has a warm bed at night, food, warmth and security the rest of his long life.
The decision to adopt a baby was the best we have ever made and has completed our lives. The journey is a long one and we are under no illusions that we will be faced with many challenges but we are determined to give our son the best we possibly can and help him become a positive contributing member of society. We keep his birth mother in our prayers and will always be grateful for her having made what was probably her toughest decision.
We encourage anyone considering adoption to take the step to create a home for a baby who has no other option in life. Your love for your son or daughter will know no boundaries as they creep into your hearts and you realise that emptiness you sometimes feel when you are alone, sad or depressed is forever gone!
JJ, Darren and Emanuel