It’s been a year since we became a whole family and life couldn’t be sweeter – Zac, now 16 months old already!!!! And he is the perfect match for us. Everyday has been one of discovery, laughter and deep, unconditional love that surprises me, because I never knew I could love so intensely.
Our journey with PROCARE started in July 2014 and I remember our fears before our first meeting ‘… will we be taking someone else’s child, will we be breaking up a family, will we be the cause of heartbreak’. These are real fears and questions we come across when we meet people interested in our story, wanting to know more… ‘What is adoption really’?
Adoption is the one system in this country that is well thought out, aimed at protecting the child above all else, aimed at keeping a biological family intact above adoption, aimed at long term, person care for the biological mother/parents and support and training for the new family. After our first meeting I felt so relieved to KNOW that this was a safe space, a secure process, that our decision was not influencing anyone else’s decision regarding their own family. I KNEW that with the process, as strict, thorough and complete as it is, we were going to be perfectly matched with our son. After struggling with infertility and the idea of perhaps not having children – I never had so much peace than when we met with PROCARE and realised adoption was for us. Since then the nine months that flew by were seamless and exciting. The process PROCARE sends you on is one of introspection, reflection, self-awareness and preparation – you cannot rush this. It brought Hilgard and I closer, it prepared us for the joy and challenges of having a baby in our home for the first time, it helped us build a network of friends who have adopted or fostered or given children up for adoption. PROCARE opened an entire world for us that we didn’t even know existed.
Zac is obviously adopted and as a result people notice and want to talk and ask and share and it’s been a beautiful catalyst for understanding South Africa as it is now. A beautiful melting pot of people that do love or want to learn how to love. We have randomly met about 40 people in the last year who have opened up to us about their being adopted, their having adopted or their going through the process of adoption… some even sharing their stories of having given a child up for adoption. We live in a small Afrikaans rural town and have never experienced racism or anger, there have been some queries and lots of questions, sometimes even concern, but I really feel that
PROCARE and the community of adoption families in this country help prepare you for what you will face as a family. I cannot thank PROCARE enough that helped prepare us to be caring, tentative, knowledgeable parents to our gorgeous, wonderful, courageous adoptasaurus Zac.