When strangers hear that our younger two children are adopted, they always ask, “So, are the older two adopted too?”
We’re apparently an aberration. Who adopts when they can have children biologically? Us, that’s who!. I was disappointed when we did our inquiries and found an organization that only assists childless couples. “But there are so many children to love, and we have so much love to give. Why would they not allow us?” was the question that came to mind. Thankfully, Procare does not discriminate.
We were warned that our children might rebel against their adopted siblings, that they would view them as interlopers. It has been the exact opposite situation. They are so happy with their siblings that they keep exclaiming, “But they don’t feel adopted. It’s like they’re just our siblings. It feels so normal!”
When asked about what it’s like having adopted siblings, the light just shines through their faces. They cannot imagine life any other way. In fact, they want four more adopted siblings and have asked us what their next siblings’ names are going to be. They love taking care of their younger siblings, they love watching them develop and mature. They just love it. For them, adoption is the only way to have siblings now. In fact, when they hear that someone is expecting a child, they ask if it’s via adoption. It’s normal.
Loving our adopted children is the same as loving our biological children. They just happen to have entered the family in a less orthodox manner. The love we feel for them, the joy when they smile, these are gifts we cannot imagine coming any other way than through adoption. Yes, we love children. And we love them whichever route they used to enter our family. It’s a love and joy I’ve seen in another family that has biological children and added to their family through adoption. They are a blessing and a privilege jut as much as our biological ones are.
I cringe when I read articles talking about how instead of baby abandonment, birth mothers should give their babies for adoption to childless couples desperate for a child. We are desperate too. Love knows no number. They are there. They exist. They wait for love from loving families- childless or not. To answer the question asking if we will adopt again. How could we ever not want do it ? Love is love, be it for someone born from you, or not. They fill my heart with so much joy, just like our biological children do. Seeing our children enjoy each other regardless of having no shared genetic bond, is the cherry on top. They’re all just siblings. Happy siblings.