PROCARE Adoptions

A blog about adoption experiences


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A Heartfelt Thanks from 2 Dads.

The first time we read about PROCARE, was in an article in Die Burger about another adoptive parent who celebrated his first Fathers Day as a new Father, after he adopted a baby boy with the help of PROCARE.  

That night we Googled PROCARE, and stumbled on their Blog (this very blog you’re reading now), and spent that whole night reading ALL the inspiring stories, and getting emotional seeing all the blended and beautiful new families in the pictures. People like you. People like us. Just people who want a child, and if we can give a child a better life through adoption, even better.  

The PROCARE Blog gave us new hope, and inspired us to start our journey with PROCARE, and no one else, and by telling our story, we hope we can also inspire other people investigating adoption, but not being completely sure.  

The day we were meeting Nicolas and the most amazing Kangaroo Mother, we will remember for the rest of our lives, and we can’t wait to share his story and journey with him! He adapted so beautifully to us, and the bond between us all is just amazing.

During the adoption process, we made a joke that the baby boy matched with us should also enjoy travelling, have a good sense of humour, and be a good sleeper… He’s all 3 (and so, so much more)! 

In January 2017 we collected the keys to our new house, the house we bought knowing that we want to start a family in. Little did we know but on the very same day our son Nicolas was born! 

We are eternally grateful to PROCARE Team and all social workers involved; and the amazing Kangaroo Mother who spoilt him and gave him love and care when he needed it the most. 

It’s the most amazing feeling being able to proudly call him our son. And we’re his Pappa and Dadda.  

Thank you, PROCARE

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Growing too quickly

Hi there PROCARE.

Time flies… my children are growing up too fast..our little princess just turned 4!  

She just started school last Monday – and big brother is getting taller by the day….. 

So ja…made little birthday table for her before they woke up this morning…family will probably all come around after work … sent some party packs and stuff to school also..so I am sure she will have a super day.

Thought I would send you ladies a note and just let you know that we are forever blessed – Thanks to the Almighty, and PROCARE 

Keep well and hope you have a blessed day.

 


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Little Charmer Boy

Dear PROCARE 

Our son is growing so fast, especially this last period. 

He loves singing, Twinkle star and Wiellie Walie. Lollos is his favourite programme and he does all the dance moves. He is potty trained and reminds us that he is a big boy. (Laugh out loud). 

He also tells us what he wants to wear and some days are really hard, when he chooses a red shorts, blue ‘Lightning Mc Queen’ T shirt and Minions rain boots. 

He is very outspoken and independent, energetic and full of love. 

Our happy little boy, growing into a beautiful little man who just melts all the girls hearts everywhere he goes (Im going to have a huge problem when he is older). My little charmer with his long eyelashes 🙂 

Thank you again PROCARE, our lives has changed so much – FOR THE BETTER since our boy came home. 

Lots of Love

A happy adoptive family

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Our son is amazing.

Our journey to adoption is like quite a few others. We have been struggling with unexplained infertility for five years when we decided to adopt. Unfortunately not all adoption agencies are as professional and passionate at creating families as PROCARE. A wrong choice in agency added another four years to the wait but God’s timing is perfect and our son is amazing.

Having waited all together 9 years by now for a child, I decided to take the plunge, change jobs and pursue my career. Two months later we got a call from PROCARE to let us know our little boy is here at long last and waiting for us. On top of starting a new job and still being in my probation period, we just started major renovations to our house which made our home just about uninhabitable. We could only laugh at the timing of all this and dive in to the unknown.

The day that we went to pick up our son was the scariest day of my life. 10 days instead of 9 months to prepare for a little one is daunting but I would not change it for anything. So many thoughts run through your mind – will he bond with us, will our family and friends accept him as our own, how do you change a nappy. This is our 1st child and we had no idea what to expect. We were absolutely overwhelmed at the love, support, acceptance and joy from our friends and family from day one. On top of that my new employer gave me the grace of maternity leave and the option to return to work when I’m ready. There was just so much favor surrounding the arrival of our son.

Our son is almost a year now and every week is a new discovery both for him and for us.

Thank you PROCARE for help bringing our family together.


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Being Grandad

 

When I first heard that my daughter and her spouse plan to adopt a black baby boy, I had quite a number of concerns: “You have only been married for over a year is it not too soon to have children?” “You do not earn big salaries, how will you be able to cope financially?” “Who will look after the baby when you are at work?” “A black boy will have difficulties to be part of a white family, especially when he grows older.” “This is not the picture I had in mind for my grandchild.”

The process for adoption went ahead and all the relevant social work and statutory requirements were met. Everybody, including my wife, seemed to be very happy and excited. I, however, did not even talk about it because I was struggling to come to grips with the idea and my concerns remained.

Then the first day arrived when I saw him.  He was still very small and everyone was smiling and exited and wanted to hold him.  When they suggested that I should hold him I declined and said not for now. I normally do not like to hold small babies and normally do not get excited about babies.  In this instance, it was even worse for me.  I did feel somewhat guilty for not being happy and not holding him, but I realised that I was being honest with myself and family.  I did not judge or condemn my daughter for the adoption but it was quite difficult to come to grips with the reality thereof.  I must admit that although I am not a racist and have friends of colour, there still might have been some old deeply hidden paradigms that were challenged inside me.  Things that made me think, especially from my Christian perspective on life.  What did inspire me though was to see my daughter being overwhelmed with joy! I realised how much this moment meant to her.

Time went by.  I saw the baby more frequently and got to hold him.  I thought about the fact that God, in His infinite wisdom, allowed this young boy to end up in my daughter’s home and in our family, and not in the township where his natural mother lives.  And yes, although there will be challenges for a black boy in a white family, there will also be many benefits and opportunities for him.  At first, when my daughter referred to me as being his grandfather, it made me feel uncomfortable, but I became more accustomed to the idea.

As the baby grew older, I got very fond of the little one.  When he started walking and started to say his first words, I shared the exited with the other family members.  One day he was waggling down the passage and called out for me: “Oupa! Oupa!”.  Well, I think that was a defining moment in my relationship with him.

Eventually that what everyone predicted (and I might have doubted) became true – he crept into my heart and I started loving him.  The natural relationship between a grandson and grandfather started to develop and I started showing him things and telling him things and spending time with him when he visits.  I am discovering his unique personality and his amazing character, alertness and observation abilities.  I love playing with him and having fun with him.

 

Today I feel proud to introduce him to other people as my grandson and I am looking forward to seeing how he will develop in future.  I aim to be there for him as a granddad for as long as I am privileged to share the wonderful gift of life with him.  I thank God for letting him into my life and for enriching it.

Oupa Daniel

 

 

 


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We adopted siblings!

Our family was blessed with our second daughter from Procare and an amazing miracle happened that both of our children are biological siblings. We wanted to take the time to share the abridged version of our story with the Procare community. 

Following several years of disappointment, anguish and tears due to infertility my wife and I were given the extremely sad news that the chances of us conceiving our own children were below 1%. Diagnosed with incompatible DNA (a rare medical phenomenon where paternal and maternal DNA create unhealthy embryos) we approached Procare as a last hope of filling the void in our hearts and family.  

A few months after completing the screening process, by the grace of God and the power of Procare, we received the call that we were matched with a beautiful baby girl. We immediately fell in love with the angel that God and Procare had delivered to us and proceeded to introduce our daughter into our family. She quickly became the object of affection for the entire family and stole the hearts of everyone we encountered with the cutest smile imaginable to man. 

Three years after receiving the best miracle God could ever provide us with, we were contemplating how to complete our family and provide our daughter with a sibling. Seeing our eldest daughter play alone was heart breaking and we knew that she needed a sibling to share the joys of life with. The problem was that our first daughter fit our family profile so well that she does not look adopted! Our minds were filled with a million questions of how to ensure that a second child wouldn’t feel left out as everyone we met (whom don’t know she was adopted) commented that “she has daddy’s eyes” or that “she looks so much like mommy”. The perfect gift that Procare and God had given us now provided us with a seemingly impossible challenge. 

Then God, and I suspect someone from Procare, was listening. We received a phone call that our daughter’s biological sibling was available for adoption. Our prayers were answered once more and our only child would have her sister to not only grow alongside and share an identical background with but also DNA!  

We completed another very easy adoption with Procare and welcomed the arrival of our second daughter! And despite any fears we had around parenting two children we are loving life as a family of 4. Our eldest daughter is relishing the role of being a “big sister” to the point of running to fetch a dummy every time her baby sister cries. 

At this point I would like to share an image of a canvas that is hanging on the wall of our daughter’s bedroom. This canvas symbolises that if we had fallen pregnant with our own children we would have been denied the joy and privilege of parenting our two daughters (whom happen to be adopted). Both daughters will grow up knowing that they didn’t grow from our bodies but from our hearts.  

So to all those individuals who are struggling with the decision to adopt or not, battling to conceive naturally and feeling like there is no where to turn. Please take it from us who have been there. Make the choice whether you want to complete your family with a beautiful baby or do you want to be pregnant? The choice for us was simple as we longed for a baby so much that being pregnant was not an issue. And loving a child that doesn’t come from your body comes naturally as if born from you.   

As a final note we wanted to send a very sincere and honest thank you to the entire Procare organisation! Every single member of Procare that helped were not only professional and well organised but truly welcoming and supportive. If it had not been for Procare I shudder to think of the empty home that we would have without our daughters.Sisters

All our love the “A” Family.